Living with Cancer-My daughter is my hero

I never really had to deal with cancer in my life. My dad had cancer and passed away shortly after, this was in 1998. I never knew. He was in Germany i was in the States, he never told me. I remember how angry i was at him, I was daddys little girl, why didn't he give me a chance to say goodbye. After a couple of years i understood, he knew if he told me i would be on my way home immediately, then what? Sit and wait for him to die? I had two children to take care off. It was his final gift to me.


Today I understand it even more so. Dealing with Asher and his cancer has to be the most frustrating thing I ever had to deal with. The up and downs. The hope the disappointments. Learning about the tumor, relief that the tumor was removed, finding out it's malignant. It's a constant struggle. You feel like you are going one step forward and two steps back.


We found out three weeks ago that we have the newest technology in radiation available right here in Oklahoma City. There are only six locations in the United States that offer it at this point. We were delighted, it's called Proton Beam Therapy, a type of radiation that minimizes damage to the healthy tissue. Exactly what we needed, we are talking Braintissue here, of course we do not want to destroy healthy tissue. They told us that they needed to find a pediatric anesthesiologist to sedate Asher during radiation, since it's targeted he can not move. It seemed to be the least of our worries.


Asher had another appointment with his oncologist yesterday, she informed my daughter that they can't find an anesthesiologist to do it. The treatment center he was supposed to go to will not have an anesthesiologist under contract till maybe January. She wants to do another MRI on sunday, see what his brain looks like, are there any changes? Has the tumor started to grow back? Does it look ok? We will see. If there are changes and they are not good she wants him to go to M.D. Anderson in Houston, if there are no changes she will talk about our options: go ahead and go to Houston anyways or wait till January for the treatment center here (IF they are for sure they will have an anesthesiologist by then). She said that she does not want him treated at her hospital because all they have available is the old style radiation. The type that destroys a LOT of healthy tissue. We are so greatful to have this doctor, she cares. She cares for Asher to get the best treatment available to him and if it means sending him away, so be it.


We are nervous about tomorrow. Scared. What will the MRI show us? My daughter is prepared to do whatever she needs to do to give Asher the best chance she can. She's 20 years old. She's been the best mommy thruout this, I'm so proud of her. She's dealt with so much while trying to care for Asher, a blown motor in her car, not being able to work since Ashers diagnosis, finding out her granny has 2 braintumors and stage 4 lung cancer, Ashers father that decided everything was just too much for him and walking out on her. She's one strong girl, I admire her strength. Now she's looking at maybe having to leave home to go to Houston for 6 weeks, the same girl that is scared to be in her apartment alone at night, she doesn't think twice about going if she has to.  My daughter is my hero.


**If you are wanting to help her and Asher out in their journey check out this post for the donation link, or email me at bkokc00 at gmail.com if you want to help in any other way, and please pray for Asher and his mommy, Thank you and god bless**